The Personalities

There are a lot of strange people in Boulder; certainly the most peculiar emerge from the woodwork to celebrate Humpday. Here are just a few of the various people you might encounter on a dark and stormy Wednesday:

Amy

Our gold standard waitress. Last we heard, Amy was in Africa studying mountain gorillas. Our loss, their gain.

Backgammon

Backgammon plays backgammon at Trident Coffee with a joie de vivre that is simultaneously frightening and awe-inspiring. If everyone could enjoy life with a tenth of her cheerful enthusiasm, the world would be a happier place indeed.

Biker Guy

Biker Guy shows up at BookEnds Cafe on a regular basis, wearing a green nylon jacket, a helmet, a rear-view mirror attached to his glasses, and of course, a bicycle. He must have a pulse in the low 40s, and cholesterol lower than that.

ColoringBook

A guy with a coloring book at the center counter at BookEnds Cafe. Dave sat next to him, and the guy glared sidelong at us. I think he was feigning childlike innocence -- the better to pick up chicks.

Consciousness

A bald guy typing something on his laptop entitled, "Achieving Full Consciousness." We figure he was struggling with a sleep disorder of some kind.

Dave

He says "five of" when he means "five til." (We think this is an eastern thing, like east of the Mississippi, east of Pittsburgh, whatever.) He also knows the elevations of every worthwhile summit in Colorado. Check out his clock page.

DBB

aka Double-Braided-Beard Guy.

InMyOpinion

Some guy who was pontificating loudly about Boulder, its customs and venues, and various other topics, to a captive audience of two, who had undoubtedly come to the BookEnds Cafe for a nice quiet cup of joe, but who unfortunately made the mistake of asking directions or something from this self-proclaimed expert. Thankfully, we haven't seen him in a while.

Megan

Megan once announced our arrival at Old Chicago on the PA system: "Steve and Dave are here. Steve and Dave have arrived." When she turned 21, Megan got utterly wasted and was never heard from again.

Renee

Who can forget her sing-song greeting of "Hi Guys" as we entered the coffee shop?

Seeked

Two college girls working on a paper were trying to determine the past tense of the word seek. They guessed seeked and glanced at each other with befuddled expressions. We spoke up and provided the correct answer, thus salvaging their semester.

Snowflake

Two college girls walking on campus near the Physics buildings, amid a light flurry of large, wet snowflakes. One said to the other, "If you sniff a snowflake, it's like you're getting high."

Steve

He says "five til" when he means "five of," which is probably a midwest thing. He also maintains this website - that's weird enough, isn't it?